I’ve wanted to write about change ever since I read about the constancy of change and resistance to it in Joel Friedlander’s blog. Do you ever resist change that’s out of your control?Seasons change and I don’t like it. Last week, Jim asked if I thought it might be time to take the beach chairs out of the car.
Me: We might still have a stretch of Indian summer.
Jim: It’s Thanksgiving.
Me: That doesn’t mean we won’t have another 75 degree day!
I finally relented and put the chairs in the attic when we brought down the Christmas decorations. Just as I patted myself on the back for so gracefully accepting that change, I heard someone ask, “Who should change?” The answer – Whoever wants a different outcome –got me thinking all over again.
How often when I want something to change do I see it as someone else’s opportunity to change rather than my own? Faced with the effort needed to change, I sometimes catch myself saying, “I want this change…but.” That’s a signal I need an attitude adjustment to change “yes but” to “yes and.”
For me, the word "but" can really put a negative spin on things. Shifting my thinking to "yes and" helps me see options instead of obstacles. And that gets me ruling possibilities in – instead of ruling them out. It’s like kicking the “but” out of my head kicks my proverbial butt in gear!
Over the years, I’ve often heard my longtime colleague David Baum say: “Only a wet baby likes change!”
I really get that - does it resonate with you?
I am energized by change. I seek it out in almost every aspect of my life. My husband is paralyzed by the thought of change. I call him "Mr. Worse Case Scenario" (lovingly of course). So I am with you on the idea of "yes and", I guess you can call me a wet baby!
ReplyDeleteI really relate to the wet baby part :)
ReplyDeleteAnd yes, the change part too. I love the idea of changing yes, but to yes, and. Will give that a try!
Great perspective, Carol. Thank you. I think I'll change and...
ReplyDeleteLinda Kidd